That day is coming. You know the one. Where the push to be romantic comes at us from every direction. This is a hard one for me. Because I am the most unromantic person and have a hard time buying into romance from anyone else. Yes, even my husband.
Long ago I loved reading Harlequin Romance novels. I was about twelve. Then as I grew older and started dating and falling in love, I came to believe that romance doesn't really exist. At least not in the way it does in those sappy books!
I think this is a reflection of the men I chose to date and fall in love with, more than the actual state of the homosapien romantic male. (My early choices were dismal ones!) But it has stuck with me.
Poor Jim! Early, in our dating days, he tried being romantic. Eventually, the deer-in-the-headlight looks I would give him when he did put an end to that. He toned it down to bringing flowers--which the cats ate. (It's hard to enjoy a dozen roses when they are sitting in the bathtub or kitchen sink because the cats are going to knock over the vase!)
Luckily Jim realizes that romance isn't a big, once or twice a year event, but something that can be done every day. He's great at the little gestures that I can believe in. He cleans the snow off my car and shovels the driveway. He'll clean the bathroom or do laundry. He scrubs the floor (a job he knows I abhor; it's the wet hair that grosses me out). He cleans out the tub drain, even though he rarely showers at home. He gets the oil changed in the van. He brings me chocolate. He takes me to eat guacamole whenever I want it.
The list is endless! Jim knows that a new electronic device will earn him more points than a dozen roses will. (I can use a device!) He gets a kick out of buying me power tools for Christmas or my birthday. The year he got me a drill press was a gold star event!
I guess I am truly lucky that Jim (whom I suspect is a romantic at heart) has adapted so well to my callous ways!
Are you a romantic or not? Do you want the grand romantic gestures? Or are you happy with the little gestures? Let me know!
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The small gestures and time spent are what I value. Over the last ten years Kyle has spent numerous hours teaching me to ride a motorcycle and planning our trips together. He warms and cleans off my car even when he doesn't have to leave the house. And he lets me warm my cold hands on him without complaint. Flowers are nice, but I can get those anywhere, I only have one Kyle.
ReplyDeleteI would love to believe that romance is alive and well. Fortunately I agree that flowers and chocolate are transistory. A man who gets the snow off of my car is forever.
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